i have had the pleasure of spending the last 5 days in MN. and can i say, as usual, my time in the cities and with some great friends makes it nearly impossible to not consider moving back— giving Minneapolis another shot. this time i’d do a bunch of things differently.

here’s the kicker. in the last 2 weeks, i have spent a ton of time asking God to be clear with me about the next steps in my future: with school, with work, with relationships. my prayer has been, “where do you want me and who do you want me investing in?”

this is what i’ve come up with so far:

1.i’d prefer to be in a warm climate near a beach

2. OR in a big city (like minneapolis) with great friends, music, and an awesome job.

3.i’d like to travel—-a lot.

4.i’d like to move out sooner than later and not because my home isn’t amazing but because it’s time to grow in that way.

and this is what i’ve got:

1.a couple friends in the cities who’d be glad to hang with me on the weekends if i was living in minnie

2.a family that would support me in anything

3.a heart that is really torn: i have never felt in my entire life, more torn between my dreams, and God’s heart for me. and i’m really broken in His presence because truly, i want what He wants, and exposing what He wants sheds light on a bunch of failures and insecurities and lies i’ve been holding.

so i’m sharing this because i could use some prayer:

for strength to do what He calls me to do—which isn’t in my nature

for a listening heart

for clarity

i’m praying that at the end of all this self discover and plans God has for my future that I’ll be found in HIM and it will be clear that HE lives in me.